Death admin and MRI scans

And a little lizard friend as today’s photo! I found him on Sunday when I was out for a walk with my two best friends, he and some of his buddies were sunning themselves on the boardwalk on what was a beautiful morning.

Grandma is now officially Dead. Well, we knew that, but you have to do paperwork and get the death registered and whatnot. Doing that seems to have helped. Now it’s official we can start shutting down her accounts and whatnot. Well, Mum can. I’m not helping with any of it. I still feel weirdly okay about her being gone, and with a vague sense that that’s wrong, somehow, but I’m not sure if that’s because everyone I tell seems to be all *gasp* oh no how awful!!!

The result is that I’m not telling many people (well, all of you guys but you don’t actually know me) because it’s just another thing I’m dealing with in my life. I don’t know. Is there a prescribed way one should behave when a relative dies? Or is there a way everyone expects you to behave, and if you don’t you’re seen as ‘cold’ or ‘callous’?

Whatever. Maybe I’ll bawl my eyes out at the funeral. But I think I did all my crying when she was taken away to the hospital and was diagnosed with terminal cancer. I dunno.

Anyway, I had an MRI scan this week. It was routine, but oh good lord, what a faff. First of all, we had to go to the other hospital for our local NHS trust which neither me nor my mother had ever been to. Very inconvenient seeing as the one I normally go to is super close to home, but there we go. The drive turned out not to be so bad and I got there in plenty of time.

Then we had the fun of three glasses of contrast fluid. I hate that stuff. It’s like… it tastes like when you lick your hand after hand sanitiser and it’s like thick water. The whole point is to distend your bowel, which is fine and I get why, but urrrrgh. Skinny jeans were a bad choice of clothing, I could feel myself expanding as I drank it.

And then there’s the contrast fluid injection, which involves a cannula. I hate. I hate needles. But it was put in so that was fine.

Finally, half an hour in the MRI tube with giant headphones on, banging noises and instructions to hold your breath. I got weirdly comfy (you lie on your front for a small bowel MRI) and almost dozed off. But I had a banging headache as well. I’m super sensitive to things like magnetic fields and I cannot watch paranormal shows where they use infrasound as it makes me sick. Yes, even through the television. I’m a strange soul, I feel stuff like that. I’m also a very good dowser. More about that in another post, but yeah. So massive headache and a grateful escape to Tesco for some luxury cookies when I was let out.

That’s that done for another year.

So it’s been an odd week so far, and it’s only Wednesday.

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